You know your birthday is going well when the lady who runs the coffee stand at work places a gift in the palm of your hand, and you look down to see the gift is a condom. A gift for my future. Yessssssss! "Well, this is certainly overly optimistic," I say, "but thanks...I think I'll hang on to it just in case." Keep the dream alive, you know what I'm sayin? After a short pause I followed that up with, "What's the expiration date on this thing?"

Hahaha! Laugh through the pain is my motto. Now am walking around with condom in back pocket like eager frat boy prepared for any possible chance to score. Actually, forgot about that. Wonder if there is telling outline in back pocket. Oh dear.

It turned out to be a Happy Birthday at Firestone day, which was ok. The tire issue is resolved by two new tires that set me back a few hundred bucks, but this is how life rolls. At least chances of tire exploding or disintegrating on highway are now slim. While waiting for tire solution, I headed over to the McDonalds next door for the Wifi. I didn't even know what to order there, but I felt like I had to pick something if I was going to sit around computing, so I got fries and a coke. I settled into seat to discover computer battery had 8 minutes left and a creeper with a staring problem sat across the way staring intensely while chomping on a Big Mac. Awkward. Fed up with uncomf scene and trademark Mickie Ds smell ON MY BIRTHDAY, I packed up, picked up my coke in a huff, and left. I've been quite the random Creeper Magnet lately, which isn't a promising sign for potential condom usage.

Whatevs. At least I have cheese and dessert and good friends to look forward to in a bit!