Ugh! Sickish. I have a sore throat and what feels like the start of a cold. I hate being sick! I get all huffy about it. As I was getting ready for work this morning, it became increasingly clear that I was not feeling good. So now I'm curled up in bed with tea, my computer, the book Fifteen by Beverly Cleary for an old times sake, comfort read, and I have the latest by Julia Glass The Whole World Over. She has another new one coming out tomorrow, though.

It may be time for a little nap.

Bumpit Up!

Thunderstorms! Yay! It's cozy goodness.

Does anyone else start laughing uncontrollably when they see those "Bumpit" commercials on TV? I guess my thing it that while I would love to have a little extra volume in my hair, the ladies on the commercial end up with seriously big poofs at the crown of their heads. I'm always like, whoa, whoa, whoa. It's comical. Flat hair is sooooooooo last year, you say? Well, Bumpit hair circa the 80s is not this year. Bump it up? No thanks.

I keep seeing all these weird, random commercials. Perhaps I'm watching too much TV lately.

Life is pretty good, peeps. My special headache that lasted several days is gone. I'm feeling much better now. I want to say more like my true self, but I don't think that's quite right. I think I'm more in tune with my natural, healthiest self, and that is incredibly freeing and exhilarating in a big way. Plus, I feel on track with the things I need to do for my well-being at the moment. Although, I need to be better at getting more sleep and going to the gym on a consistent basis. I've made my return to the gym, but so far it's sporadic. It's time for a routine.

I picked out the cutest pair of brown and turquoise glasses at the eye doctor the other day! The only problem is that they are pricey, so now I must wait to buy them. I do not like waiting. It annoys me. I thought I may wait until January to get them, but January is sounding really far away. And I need these glasses now. I need them.

Another movie recommendation: Away We Go.

Movie I can't wait to see: 500 Days of Summer. Another one I'm curious about and was bummed to have missed at SIFF is Adam. But, I see on the movie site that there are advanced screenings happening around here in the next few weeks. I'm happy! If any of my Seattle friends would like to check it out with me, let me know. The reviews are good, and I hope it will give a positive and realistic perspective of an AS/NT relationship without being cheesy.

My walk home from work the other night was very strange. It's hard to describe the weirdness with words. I don't actually walk all the way home. I park in a neighborhood that's about 20-25 minutes away from work, and most days I walk to and from the office (this continues from my time in Israel. I still love taking long walks while listening to music to clear my head). When I was about halfway to my car, I realized that I was going along without my keys. Aaaah! The worrisome of this is that although I can access the main office with a keycard, if my keys are locked in my office-office, I'm out of luck unless anyone else is around with a key. This means no house key and no car key. Luckily I have others elsewhere, but getting that all sorted out would be a huge hassle involving other people in my world. It was pretty late, so I bolted back to work, frantically thinking about who might still be there or who I could ask for help if I needed it. Fortunately, I hadn't left my keys in my office, just the bathroom. Whew! My mind was out to lunch as I left, apparently. Anyway, on my way back to the office, I had a strange interaction with a man who asked me, "Excuse me, ma'am. Do you know where a person could get help if they're just stuck?" Stuck? Stuck how? Stuck in life? Does this man need counseling? Is he on the edge? After some questioning, it turned out that his car had run out of gas, and he didn't have any money to fill it up. I felt bad turning him down (politely, of course), but I had no cash, and I was distracted by my own problem.

Then, after finding my keys with great relief, I started my walk back to the car, calling my friend Chris to catch up. While chatting with her, a man on a bicycle wearing sunglasses and an adventure hat on the opposite side of the street called out, "Hey bitch, what's up?" Uhhhhh. The guy seemed a bit kooky, but I certainly didn't expect THAT to come out of his mouth. I didn't want to interrupt my conversation, so I just gave him a Look. But, I was thinking, bitch? I'll show you bitch! I'm a loose cannon, man!

Onward. Finally, I get to my car, and I'm sitting inside finishing up my conversation with C (I have a Just Say No policy to driving and talking on the phone). Suddenly, I see this man on a motorcycle approaching. I watch as he does all these funny kicks with his legs while whizzing by. What is going on in the world? So weird.

I had a fabulous evening with Monice the other night. We went for belated birthday dinner at Tilth, and then off to Molly Moon's for birthday cake ice cream sundaes. I'm addicted to Molly Moon's. So delicious! The food at Tilth is very good, but it's pretty expensive for what it is, so I'm not sure how often I'll go back. They also seem to be fixated on corn, as it makes an appearance in many of their dishes.

Monice and I spent hours talking, talking, talking, and laughing, of course. I love wonderful girl nights like that. A funny at the restaurant happened when we were talking about how men respond to situations in relationships. I said something to Monice along the lines of how I think often men want to be helpful, but they're just not sure what to do. So they do nothing, because they don't want to do the wrong thing. I wasn't really aware of the waiter hovering over the table refilling our water glasses, but he chimed in with, "I just have to tell you that's exactly right. I've been there and that's how it is."

Oh. Him. Hahaha! Thank you for validating my point, sir.

Many of you know that along with taking classes and reading books about autism, I've also gotten into blogs written by people who are on the spectrum. I'm a lurker. Well...and sometimes a commenter. Classes are interesting, and they help in the processing of concepts. Books provide a lot of useful information, especially in understanding the diagnostic criteria and some of the complexities of the disorder, or provide a more authentic perspective if they're written by a person who is autistic, but what I really want to learn is what life is like right now for the adults who have ASD. In my curious, let-me-see-your-truth sort of way that is, frankly, something I seem to crave in most aspects of life, I want to understand the best I can what it's like to be a person who perceives the world differently, or perhaps has strengths or faces challenges I don't due to neurological differences.

For me, the good stuff is all about relationships, friendships, love, sex, connection, and how people interact with each other and the world. I have so many questions. That list could be its own post. Real answers on these topics is hard to find in books and research papers. It wouldn't be appropriate or comfortable for me to bring these subjects up with the people I currently know who have an ASD. So, for now, I turn to the blogs. And, as I lurk, it's becoming clear how highly unique these experiences are for each individual. Not surprising, of course, but if you study something while being detached from the people for too long, it becomes far too easy to generalize. I feel like I'm in that danger zone. A book can tell me about special interests, theory of mind, organization skills, bullying, zapped energy, frustration, loneliness, comorbids, the need for lots of alone time, the inability to read social cues, teaching/intervention strategies, support systems, and on and on. I can spout off a lot of facts, let me tell you (and sometimes I do! My poor friends and family.). But, while interesting to learn, for me there is something sort of empty about swimming in all these facts. A big piece is missing. I'd like to speak with a person rather than look at a bulleted list, please.

It'd be nice if I could walk up to someone, tap them on the shoulder, and say, "Would you mind if I jumped in your head for five minutes, a few hours, or a day? I want to know how the world looks to you, how you feel, what you truly want. I want to see how we are the same and how we are different. I want the honest, uncensored, deeply personal truth of who you are. Sound ok?"

Yeah, yeah. I'm back from fantasyland now.

But wait! Yesterday I found an incredible blog that made me feel like I was doing this for a little bit: The Incipient Turvy. I happened on this blog from another one I like, and I randomly chose to read Part One of the Awkward Love series (at the bottom of the list on the overview page, following the link). I was immediately drawn in. And then I read parts two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, and nine. I couldn't stop. It's my new favorite, and I think it's the best thing I've read in a long, long time. The author is simply an amazing writer who is deeply insightful, funny, and candid in describing his experiences, especially in dating and romance. I love the metaphors, especially the screensaver. I've thought about that a lot. These metaphors really do help you "get it." I liked the sections on social clumping and Red Rover. I think I like that he is roughly my age, but I'm not sure why. The Doctor seems very cool. I loved the part in a later post where the writer talks about, as a kid, prematurely starting to miss a moment while it's still happening, because you know it will soon be gone. Yes! I know exactly what he means, because I've done that all my life, but even more so as a kid too. I could gush on and on here about everything I liked, and sound like a huge dope, because it is every single bit of parts 1-9. So, I'll stop myself now and just encourage you to read all or parts of Awkward Love if you're interested. I so completely loved it.

Ab Circle!

So, on the 4th of July, Trav and I were watching a kids show for a little while, and soon we noticed every commercial break included an ad for the Ab Circle Pro. The commercials were seriously making me laugh non-stop. I'm not sure why (maybe you can tell me if you watch the video). I called Molly and Joe in to see, and even Joe's parents were forced to watch it with me and comment. Trav and I made little jokes about the Ab Circle, talking about having one.

Today, when leaving work, my cell notified me of a voice mail message. It was Trav calling to say, in a serious and slightly grumpy voice, "Baconar...for Christmas I want an abcycle. Well, bye."

Ha! It turns out Molly and Trav were discussing Santa getting in to the new house on their way home tonight. Since they don't have a real fireplace with a chimney (just one of those electric numbers with the fake light-up log that I've seen before and also find hilarious. I'm like, flip the switch! flip the switch! so I can look at it), Molly made up a scenario where Santa climbs in through her window, and she tells him what Travis wants. She said to Trav, "I'll say to Santa Travis would like a...." expecting that he would say something related to his obsession Thomas the train, but instead he filled in the blank with "Abcycle!"

Watch this commercial, and I guarantee that the Ab Circle will move to the top of your 2009 Christmas list too! Not.

Pleo Madness

We have two Pleos at work now. Sammy is the boy, and Lucy is the girl. We know Lucy is the girl by the gold bow, from a box of truffles, I tied around her neck to indicate girlness. They've mostly been hanging out in my office, so it'd kinda like a mini-dino zoo in there. People come by and I end up doing "demos" which aren't really demos at all. It's me turning the switch from off to on and telling people to pet the Pleo. So far, Trav is the only kid I've shown them to, but I've noticed an interesting difference in the ways women and men respond to Pleo. Women are much more into it and eager to pet and play with Lucy or Sammy. They'll talk to them and hold them. Guys, on the other hand, seem a bit creeped out. They look at the Pleos and may be entertained (or perplexed), but are reticent to touch them. When they do, it's in the way I might approach touching a tarantula. I say things like, "See, she likes to be scratched under the chin" and demonstrate, and they look from me to the Pleo and back again and say, "Yeah." So then I try to be encouraging which quickly turns to impatience and eye rolling and comments like, "Come on! Just touch the Pleo already!" NG.

I showed Lucy to the WB the other day, and he got uncomf with her staring at him. The dinos really do have a staring problem. Before he left my office I jokingly apologized for Lucy's staring, explaining that the Pleos are a bit delayed in the development of social skills. He replied with "Oh, well, they'll fit in just fine here then."

Hahaha! HA!

He's right.

Unfortunately, Lucy arrived to us from Amazon dot com with a problem. She has a bad battery. This is very upsetting to me, because I bonded with Lucy very quickly. She's more fun and affectionate than Sammy. She likes to play tug of war with her leaf, and when she first "hatched" we had a funny moment with her. She stretched out her back leg and suddenly fell to the side, laying motionless. My coworker Raven said, "Pleo?" in a hesitant, questioning, are-you-dead? sort of way. Lucy responded with a snore. We were cracking up! When there was talk of sending her back, I refused to let that happen. I made a fuss. I will miss her too much, and what if we get a dud in her place? Also, the company that made Pleos (Ugobe) went out of business, but they were recently bought by Jetta Company Limited who plans to get the Pleos back in action. So, I got on the internets to find an alternative solution. It turns out that Pleo batteries are hard to find right now. Some people have posted directions and photos on how to make your own. I considered this option and determined that it's a short road to disaster for me or my coworkers to try to rig up a homemade battery, although there is bound to be people in our department who can do it. When I failed to find a place to purchase a battery on my own, I turned to emailing Jetta directly to request help. They responded! Although Jetta isn't quite there in terms of production, they directed me to a site where I could purchase a new battery at a reasonable price. Yesssssssss!

holidayprojectors.com

Yes, my friends, there is a website that sells holiday projectors...and Pleos. Seriously, you've got to check this out. Click on the link and scroll through the page. Projector, projector, projector...dino! It's like an episode of Sesame Street. "One of these things just doesn't belong here...one of these things just isn't the same..." I never knew such a site existed, but now I have my eye on Mr. Christmas Hollywood Search Lights. And, a new Lucy battery has been ordered. She will not be leaving me!

I've turned into one of those people who blogs about the Pleos. When we first got them, I scoffed at all the websites and YouTube videos dedicated to the robot dinos, and now I am one of them. Pretty soon I'll have links to my own videos and tags set up specifically for Lucy and Sammy reports. You'll see.

For the 4th of July last year, Mols & Trav were in town, and we went to friend Jen's to hang out, watch fireworks, and so Trav could swim in her pool. Molly and I didn't bring our suits, though, and Trav needed help, so I got in the pool in my clothes to swim with him and ended up soaking wet. This year on the 4th, I was in Oregon City visiting Mols and Trav, and once again I ended up soaking wet in my clothes. We went to a little mini-festival at a park, and there was one of those little fountain parks for kids there, so Trav and I--and eventually Molly and Joe--ended up playing in the water. It was cute and fun! At first Trav seemed unsure about playing in the water in his clothes. My hope for him is that he will take every opportunity to engage in unabashed silliness and fun in his life, and I encourage that whenever I can. This is why I danced and skipped and ran through the fountains with him and all the other little kids on Saturday. He got into it. At the end he had this little plastic container from our shaved ice that he filled up with water and would say, "Baaaaaaay-con, I have some soup for YOU!" Then he'd toss the water at me, or whoever his target was at the moment. This was fantastic in the 90-something degree weather.

The weekend away was lovely and relaxing, minus the traffic. Mols showed me around Oregon City. We went to the farmers market and shopped for Molly's place. We went to a farm to pick raspberries. They are so incredibly delicious! We played badminton. We barbecued and ate tasty food. We did fireworks at the house and watched the neighbor's impressive display. The neighbor came over to introduce himself and to invite us to watch. He said something, in his stoner voice, along the lines of, "Hi there, my name is Charlie, and I live across the street. I've lived here for 15 years. We have, like, four hours worth of fireworks, man, and you're more than welcome to come over to watch." When Trav heard this he turned to me to say quietly, "Charlie. Like Charlie the Unicorn" and grinned all pleased with himself. Trav and I went to a cute little park and swung on the swings. We played with his Thomas trains. My sister and I talked and laughed.

Before leaving to P-town, I saw the Hangover with friends. Very funny movie with a lot of great lines. Loved it!

More soon, my friends, but for now I must sleep. In doing things to help with my overall physical and mental health, I'm making changes that ultimately will be very good, but for right now in the transition, I have an ongoing headache. Bleah. It's a bit rough, and I'll be happy when this phase is over. The best news is that I now have a prescription for monthly massages and, after a lot of thought, I've decided to take a new, more natural approach in dealing with my predictable cycles of dark. After a nice appointment with my doctor to discuss possible options, I realized what I've been doing isn't working, yet I keep sticking with it. I'm not sure why. I think I keep hoping it will work, even though it hasn't felt quite right to me for a while now. In talking with my doctor, I realized I'm running out of options there that don't involve putting some sort of medication or hormones in my body. After researching the latest thing she wanted me to try, I decided to opt out. I definitely feel western medicine has its place, but I'm also interested in and believe in alternative methods of healing. I haven't explored that yet for this issue, and I think it's time. I want to give this approach a chance, and give myself a chance to really be in tune with myself and determine what is best for me. I'm open to blending western medicine with alternative healing if that ends up being the right fit, but for now I'm focusing on finding a naturopath and an acupuncturist (which I keep wanting to spell with two c's like acc. Sigh). I'll certainly report back on my experiences.

Oooooooo, and to change things up further, Em came over tonight and helped me switch my meditation room and bedroom around, so I have a new bedroom. Mostly I did this because my old room is right below the neighbors living room space, and I was finding myself increasingly annoyed by the noise. I'm hoping this new arrangement will help with that, but it may be time to start thinking about moving on. However, the change itself is refreshing. The old meditation room is smaller, but with the switch it feels like a cozy little sanctuary. Crossing my fingers that it's a QUIET little sanctuary.

Nighty night!

So, the hits keep on coming as far as seeing icky things on the telly is concerned. What's the deal??? After seeing the real life broken arm, and then the disgusting torture on Weeds, here is what has happened:

1. A documentary I watched on fundamentalist religion included a segment on bloodless surgery in which a liver transplant is done. I'm following along--la, la, la--not expecting that viewers will be subjected to clips from the actual surgery. Yep! Next thing I know, this slippery liver is casually plucked from one body and dropped into a plastic bowl filled with ice and water. Then, a nurse or doctor or somebody who's dressed in scrubs carefully takes the bowl into the other operating room. It's like when you have a too full cup of coffee that you try not to spill on your way back to your desk. You walk all slow and as steady as possible, staring down at the cup, willing all the contents to stay contained to avoid a big mess. That was exactly what was going on here, only with a major organ on ice in blue tupperwear. I watched in horror praying to God that the person doesn't trip, sending the liver flying, that no sloshing occurs, etc, etc. Aaaaaaaaaaah! Here I am all settled in to watch a nice little program that will possibly teach me something about fundamentalism, and suddenly it takes a turn. Which, when I think about it, kinda mirrors my own views of organized religion. Seems ok on the surface but often takes a turn! That's all I'm going to say about the movie because, honestly, I didn't think it was well-done or informative. It didn't shed any new light and just isn't worth discussing, which is a bummer.

2. I caught up on the new season of True Blood with Em. Now, I can hear you saying, "Oh come on, you have to know there is going to be violence in that," and it's true. I do. But, I feel like they're really outdoing themselves so far this year. After a human prisoner is basically ripped apart by a vampire, and the body parts go flying, I had a highly inappropriate response. I started laughing. Not that watching another prisoner fishing around in the dead guy's dismembered hip to find the metal plate to use to help him break his own chains and escape certain death is hilarious per se, but somehow the over-the-top gore and horror of the situation really got me giggling. I'm *losing* it. The show is still good, though, and often truly humorous. I'll take body parts flying and landing with a thud for the vampire in a track suit at the mall any day. Heh. Can't wait to see what happens next!

3. THEN, I watched the documentary This Film is Not Yet Rated. I have a lot to say about this one. It is definitely an interesting and informative look at the MPAA's rating system. I've always kinda wondered how ratings for movies are decided, and by who, and it turns out no one else really knows how this works either. It's all Top Secret Information. Here are the key things that stood out for me:

• As far as I can tell, being an MPAA rater is like participating in the witness protection program. You go in and park in a secure garage, you do your "job" of determining ratings, and then you're protected from anyone ever finding out who you are. Names are not released. Directors do not know who is making decisions about their movies, and this film makes it very clear that precedence is irrelevant in the decisions, especially in the difference between an R or NC-17 rating.
  

• Director Kirby Dick hires a female private investigator, and her partner, to help him track down the names of the MPAA raters. It was hilarious to watch this woman screech around town in her minivan in hot pursuit of raters heading to the local chicken joint for dinner. But, she did a good job catching photos and footage of them. The organization claims that raters are parents of children ages 5-17. For the most part, this is a lie.

• Sex or violence? Sex or violence? Which one do you think has the biggest impact on stricter MPAA ratings? If you guessed sex, you are right! Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding! Most of us are aware that Americans are weird about sex, so this probably isn't a big surprise for all you smarties out there. Turns out showing a sword entering the back of a man's head and exiting through the mouth, among other violent atrocities, gives you an 'R', while a flash of pubic hair takes you right into NC-17 territory. Say what??? Really? Yes. It's ok if you show several people gunned down, someone sawed in pieces by a flying chain saw, or a fake breast ripped out with a knife; you'll get an R. It's cool for youngsters to see that. But, someone getting off through graphic sex or masturbation? Oh no, no, no. That is wrong with a capital W and is swiftly assigned an NC-17. Good lord. The message here is disturbing. Graphic sex is more uncomfortable or upsetting for people to watch than ruthless murder and brutal violence. Uh...yeah.
  

• Interestingly enough, not all types of sex leads to stricter ratings. There are layers of acceptability. Heterosexual sex seems to be alright, as long as you avoid the pubic hair, stick to a couple of biblical (read: vanilla) positions, and don't focus too much on the woman getting any pleasure out of it. That's right. The longer the female orgasm, the more likely you're going to be strapped with an NC-17 rating. Hmph. Thanks for nothing MPAA! Heaven forbid that anyone under the age of 17 should ever find out that a woman *gasp* could possibly enjoy sex! The same (double) standard hold true for masturbation. A guy doing his thing with an apple pie is a-okay, but a girl taking care of business, even outside of her underwear, somehow is not. Don't even get me started about gay sex and movie ratings. Argh. The double standards, blatant censorship based on skewed moral priorities, and misguided decisions on the part of the MPAA really bug me.
  

• Finally, before this post reaches novel-length proportions, a director is allowed to "appeal" the rating assigned to his/her movie. While the members of the appeals committee is Top Secret Information as well, we learned that clergy (yes, you read right, CLERGY) serve on the appeals board. Siiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiigh. Another Really???
  

So, This Film is Not Yet Rated is rated NC-17, and I guess I should have considered what this might mean before watching it. I did not. It ended up that several movies I've refused to watch due to my sensitivity to disturbing violence (Rated R!) were featured here: Sin City, American Psycho, Boys Don't Cry, to name a few. And, watching this movie, I got to view all the bad parts in one clump that made me avoid the movies in the first place! It was intense and upsetting on some levels to see all this horror in a concentrated period of time, but also strangely better than sitting through the movies themselves, I think. It was like confronting a fear in a way. I just got it over with all at once by watching the documentary, while in the individual movies I'd be all stressed out, tense and distracted waiting for the violence to come, preparing to cover my eyes or run away, unable to get anything from the story or film-making at all. I'm weird that way. I think the problem is that when I watch a movie, I'm very much in the present moment of what's happening on the screen. I have a hard time separating reality from the story, and I start obsessing about the reality in the story.

One other thing I appreciated about this documentary was the interview with director/actor Kevin Smith when he said the thing he finds most offensive in movies is using the concept of a 'woman in peril' to drive a plot. Usually this takes the form of rape or other violence against women, and it happens too much. This was followed by a montage of rape scenes from movies, which really sent me spiraling, but I thought he made an important point. I was glad to hear a director calling that out.

As you can probably tell, I highly recommend This Film is Not Yet Rated for its interesting and insightful look at the MPAA and the movie business. And so you can get as huffy about the whole thing as I am.

First...

Happy Birthday to my gorgeous girl, Monice! Can't wait to celebrate!

Congratulations to Molly & Trav who will be moving into their new townhouse in Oregon City in just a few days! It's been a long road for this deal to go through, but finally it has. Yay!

Now...

The Melancholy Megan Mode has run its course once again, and I've smoothly transitioned to the ever familiar "What was that about?" phase. I'm more present and alert and energetic and content and engaged and positive. Not a tear has fallen on the keyboard. In short, I'm happy and feeling back to my true self. While I'm glad to return to good cheer, this time I'm not simply letting it go. I'm serious about taking steps to create more balance in my moods, and this week I'm starting that process. Of course, I'm going to do this while also enjoying feeling great! The problem is that sometimes it's difficult to accurately describe the dark while I'm basking in the light.

My massage on Sunday was awesome. The therapist did a fantastic job, and the spa has this amazing whirlpool tub you can sit in for 15 minutes or so before your treatment. The whole experience was amazing and relaxing. I loved this place! I'm definitely going back.

In my world of if there's a potentially awkward situation that can be made even more awkward, I'll do it, this has been a good week. I have a special talent.

I'm a bit caught up in school confusion at the moment. I've been trying to figure out the best program to pursue for my interest in working with young adults and adults with autism, primarily in big life transitions. Everyone I talk with is very supportive, and tells me there is great need in this area, but no one seems clear on how I should go about preparing for it. Argh. I've mainly talked with faculty in different areas and a little bit with people who are autistic. The two front runners are psychology and special education, although occupational therapy has been suggested as well. Both have major pros and a few drawbacks. I'm not on board with pursuing two full degrees at this point, so now I need to determine which one is the best fit and how I can supplement what I choose for better preparation (special ed with some psych courses or vice versa). I feel a little overwhelmed and uncertain right now, because there doesn't appear to be a definitive answer. It doesn't appear that a program exists for exactly what I want to do, so it's kind of like stumbling around in a pitch black room trying to find the light switch. I don't know where it is or how to get there, but I'll know it when I do. I have more referrals of people to consult, so I'm going to push forward and just have faith that the right answer will show up.

I just started reading the book Daniel Isn't Talking, which is interesting and well-written, but also depressing. I don't think the autism aspect is bothering me, but more the descriptions of motherhood and housewife drudgery for the main character, Melanie. In many ways, it feels like that would exist for her no matter what, and that's nightmarish to me. I feel like she's trapped in blahness, and I'm trapped with her while reading. Ugh. Don't get me wrong, I think being a stay at home mom can be really great and satisfying for many people, but there is something unsettling about this woman in this role, even though it's clear that she loves and adores her children very much. Maybe it's the intensity of Melanie's stress and worry that I find off-putting. Sometimes she seems a bit hysterical. On the other hand, this mom is depressed and anxious about her child's development (pre-diagnosis right now), so the book is doing a thorough job of conveying her emotions. I don't know. We'll see how it goes as I continue.

The other day I watched the movie Conversations with Other Women. I didn't have high hopes for this one, but it took me by surprise with the interesting split-screen style. The whole movie was primarily talk between the two quirky and charming main characters, a man and a woman with a past who see each other again at a wedding reception. Sometimes, when they are deep in conversation, one side of the screen focuses on her and the other on him, so you see in more detail their individual reactions to what's being said--together. At other times, one side of the screen shows the exchange between them, while the other simultaneously shows a clip from the past or something else related to the discussion in the present. It was a little strange getting used to this style at first. I wasn't sure I was going to like it, but then I found it really worked. I felt like I could understand the story on a deeper level from this method of combining individual and shared experiences in both the past and present. It could have been really messy or confusing, but somehow it wasn't. The story came together more fully and with greater depth than a standard movie.

More soon. Later, gators!