First...

Happy Birthday to my gorgeous girl, Monice! Can't wait to celebrate!

Congratulations to Molly & Trav who will be moving into their new townhouse in Oregon City in just a few days! It's been a long road for this deal to go through, but finally it has. Yay!

Now...

The Melancholy Megan Mode has run its course once again, and I've smoothly transitioned to the ever familiar "What was that about?" phase. I'm more present and alert and energetic and content and engaged and positive. Not a tear has fallen on the keyboard. In short, I'm happy and feeling back to my true self. While I'm glad to return to good cheer, this time I'm not simply letting it go. I'm serious about taking steps to create more balance in my moods, and this week I'm starting that process. Of course, I'm going to do this while also enjoying feeling great! The problem is that sometimes it's difficult to accurately describe the dark while I'm basking in the light.

My massage on Sunday was awesome. The therapist did a fantastic job, and the spa has this amazing whirlpool tub you can sit in for 15 minutes or so before your treatment. The whole experience was amazing and relaxing. I loved this place! I'm definitely going back.

In my world of if there's a potentially awkward situation that can be made even more awkward, I'll do it, this has been a good week. I have a special talent.

I'm a bit caught up in school confusion at the moment. I've been trying to figure out the best program to pursue for my interest in working with young adults and adults with autism, primarily in big life transitions. Everyone I talk with is very supportive, and tells me there is great need in this area, but no one seems clear on how I should go about preparing for it. Argh. I've mainly talked with faculty in different areas and a little bit with people who are autistic. The two front runners are psychology and special education, although occupational therapy has been suggested as well. Both have major pros and a few drawbacks. I'm not on board with pursuing two full degrees at this point, so now I need to determine which one is the best fit and how I can supplement what I choose for better preparation (special ed with some psych courses or vice versa). I feel a little overwhelmed and uncertain right now, because there doesn't appear to be a definitive answer. It doesn't appear that a program exists for exactly what I want to do, so it's kind of like stumbling around in a pitch black room trying to find the light switch. I don't know where it is or how to get there, but I'll know it when I do. I have more referrals of people to consult, so I'm going to push forward and just have faith that the right answer will show up.

I just started reading the book Daniel Isn't Talking, which is interesting and well-written, but also depressing. I don't think the autism aspect is bothering me, but more the descriptions of motherhood and housewife drudgery for the main character, Melanie. In many ways, it feels like that would exist for her no matter what, and that's nightmarish to me. I feel like she's trapped in blahness, and I'm trapped with her while reading. Ugh. Don't get me wrong, I think being a stay at home mom can be really great and satisfying for many people, but there is something unsettling about this woman in this role, even though it's clear that she loves and adores her children very much. Maybe it's the intensity of Melanie's stress and worry that I find off-putting. Sometimes she seems a bit hysterical. On the other hand, this mom is depressed and anxious about her child's development (pre-diagnosis right now), so the book is doing a thorough job of conveying her emotions. I don't know. We'll see how it goes as I continue.

The other day I watched the movie Conversations with Other Women. I didn't have high hopes for this one, but it took me by surprise with the interesting split-screen style. The whole movie was primarily talk between the two quirky and charming main characters, a man and a woman with a past who see each other again at a wedding reception. Sometimes, when they are deep in conversation, one side of the screen focuses on her and the other on him, so you see in more detail their individual reactions to what's being said--together. At other times, one side of the screen shows the exchange between them, while the other simultaneously shows a clip from the past or something else related to the discussion in the present. It was a little strange getting used to this style at first. I wasn't sure I was going to like it, but then I found it really worked. I felt like I could understand the story on a deeper level from this method of combining individual and shared experiences in both the past and present. It could have been really messy or confusing, but somehow it wasn't. The story came together more fully and with greater depth than a standard movie.

More soon. Later, gators!