Is technology spawning new dating disasters?

In one word: YES!!!

OK, so maybe not disasters, exactly, but I firmly believe the misuse of technology is a common problem in dating relationships nowadays. I hope you'll take a minute to read the article, because I'm going to comment on a few things from it based on this list of recommendations from dating experts:

1. Turn off cell phones during dates.
   
   Yes! While I have yet to go out with someone who texts wildly during dinner or a movie, I have spent time with guys who obsessively clutch their phones like it is the source of life energy, and who won't hesitate to answer a call at the table of a restaurant and chat away. Tacky. And, awk-ward, as you sit there staring at your tofu phad thai wondering how long the chit-chat is going to continue. Is this a case of bad manners or a he's just not that into you sitch? I guess it could go either way, but I think there are people who see this as perfectly acceptable behavior. I find it particularly annoying when someone actively pursues time with me, but then spends said time cultivating all their other relationships via phone. What is the point here?
   
   This is true for anyone in my life, actually. I understand the need to have the phone available for emergency situations or special circumstances, but in general I don't take calls or engage in texting while having face time with family or friends. When spending time with someone I care about, I want to be fully present in the moment and give my attention to that individual. This shows respect for that person and the relationship you share, and I find it a lot more fulfilling if our focus is on our time together.
   
   
2. Use text messages solely for sweet nothings.
   
   Yes! Yes! Yes! I participated in...I guess you'd call it dating...with a guy whose primary mode of communication was by text/IM. Ugh! I'll say it again. UGH! Not fun. For that active avoider, I think it felt like a safer, easier way to communicate. Yeah right. In my eyes, it started to look dodgy, immature, and just plain annoying. Not to mention that it led to a whole slew of ambiguity, misunderstanding, and issues. Don't get me wrong, texting and IMing can be fun ways to communicate, but that's what they should be used for -- fun. When cyber conversations make up the bulk of your relationship, you will have serious problems. Too often, important issues were discussed between us with an IM/text buffer, which meant that the authenticity of the conversation was always in doubt and the meaning of words "said" were often unclear. IM/texting prevented a true connection, which may have been the point for one of us, but it didn't go over well with the me who thrives in truly connected relationships. In the end, though, I had to take responsibility for the fact that I participated in this way of relating, thinking that any form of communication was better than none. It turns out it wasn't. Drama! I learned my lesson, and now I'm committed to cultivating adult relationships where mature relating is valued and used by both parties.
   
   
3. Only address serious matters or break ups on the phone or in-person.
   
   Did you read above? How do you think that relationship ended? If you guessed cyberly, you're right on the money! Go you. You know, it was what it was, but it won't ever be again. I agree that when you've spent significant time with someone, the decent way to address serious matters is in person, no matter how difficult it is to do. Difficult things are a part of life, especially in relationships. You know this going into it, and I don't think the availability of technology should be a free pass to run from unpleasantness just because you can. That's lame and unfair to both of you. Communicating face to face shows respect for what you share, or shared, with a person, granting proper attention to the importance of the transition you are about to make. It totally says something about your character, and my hope is that good character is a desirable quality for most of us.